Metal
by Salazarfalcon
Summary: Silver remembers the first time he laid eyes on Gold, and he was instantly irritated. Gold remembers being treated slightly unfairly and wondering if he might be just a little bit of a masochist.


**Metal**

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><p>Disclaimer: ...No.<p>

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><p>Pairing: Gold x Silver<p>

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><p>Silver can remember the first time he lays his eyes on Gold. Far too brash, far too confident, far too easy and far too open, he irritates Silver immediately. Even if he hadn't found out the boy's name, everything about him screamed that he'd be Silver's foil, and he should have known that that first meeting wouldn't be the last. When he thinks about that time, all he can remember is annoyance and bright, playful golden eyes that he can't get out of his brain.<p>

Gold can remember the first time he meets Silver, and even now, the thought of it stills stirs up a tiny bit of deeply buried resentment. He knows that he didn't deserve the shove he got or the bad attitude or the harsh words or the criticisms but even before he properly knew the other boy, something about him stuck with him. Maybe it was the fiery hair or the even more fiery (and admittedly prickly) personality, or maybe it was those shining silver eyes that show so much more about him than his face.

It takes a long time before Silver accepts that there's more to Gold than childish immaturity and sunshine and rainbows. At first glance, that appears to be all there is, and oh, is there a lot of it. But that's not all and he knows it now; knows it from the crinkling of his forehead when a particularly sobering thought flashes through his brain and the sympathy in his eyes whenever he looks at Silver than makes him inexplicably enraged for a reason he can't put words to. Gold is confusing and more complicated than he'd seem and Silver wishes that it didn't make him want to read him like a book.

It only takes about half as long for Gold to understand that there's more to Silver than aspirations to be the grumpiest and prickliest of all grumpy and prickly hedgehogs. He sees it in the way he won't flinch after smashing his fist into a tree trunk and the way his totodile looks at him, a soft and blatantly worshipping expression that doesn't fit with what he'd seen of the other boy's treatment of his pokémon, harsh just like the rest of him. He sees it when Silver refuses to stay in a pokémon center with its warmth and walls, instead opting for the cold and the forests, as if punishing himself and it makes Gold want to do the same.

Like a boomerang, Silver somehow keeps finding his way back to Gold. No matter which direction he goes or how far he walks, they always seem to meet each other somewhere along the line. This makes a large part of him angry because he's not on the road to make friends or be nice, but holds back the snide remark he was going to make when Gold unthinkingly hands him a plate with half of the meal one evening as if there's nothing weird about it.

Sometimes Gold leads and sometimes he follows, but somehow, he always makes his way back to Silver, just as he intends. He's quite unsure as to who's orbiting who but can't bring himself to mind too much, especially when he sees an unusual gentling in the other trainer's eyes as he feeds his pokémon, always more than himself and always first these days. He thinks he might be understanding, just a little bit.

Eventually, Silver thinks that this might be what it feels like to have a friend, and he's not sure if the thought terrifies him or not, never mind how much the thought that he might not be scared scares him. It rains for hours one night as he's walking through Goldenrod, deserted at such a late hour. The water burns and stings, but he's not cold at all until he's practically tackled and dragged back to the pokémon center by Gold, who only has socks on his feet but an umbrella to press insistently into his hands. Only when the warm air hits his skin does he shiver, and he doesn't stop no matter how many blankets he piles on. Gold watches quietly as he wrings out his hair with trembling hands, the only thing betraying his concern lies in his eyes.

Gold has always been a friendly, sociable boy, and as such has always had his share of friends at any given point in time. Very rarely has he ever felt honest-to-god alone, even on the road. A pokégear is a useful thing and it means that he always has someone that he can call if he ever does start feeling lonely. Not lately, though. It's gotten to the point that a five minute phone call only means so much and the contentment only lasts until he hangs up. He thinks about Silver, who refused to come with him and made Gold so angry that he threw up his hands and said forget it, he could do whatever he wanted, and it doesn't take Gold thirty seconds before he's out the door, holding an umbrella and raincoat but forgetting his rain boots entirely.

_Good night._ Those two words aren't exactly in Silver's repertoire, and he's shocked when they tumble from his lips one night as they're settling down for sleep. He's given up on trying to make Gold go away and instead tries his best to think of him as one of those creepy-crawlies that he always seems to find in his sleeping bag after forgetting to shake it out. It doesn't really work, though, especially when they seem to share more these days than he's entirely comfortable with. Silver has let sneasle stay out of its ball tonight, and he wishes that the soft feeling of long ears and silky black fur against his chin wasn't so comfortable and so prone to making his blinks slower and his breathing begin to level out. Gold's caught his slip of the tongue and Silver catches those bright eyes staring at him from across the remains of their fire, crinkled up in a smile. Silver glares at him and turns over to hide the color rising in his cheeks.

_Good night._ Gold always replies when Silver messes up and says something nice, especially when it's clear that he doesn't mean to do it. It's easy to be sullen and spiney by accident; all it takes is a particularly bad mood (not hard for Silver to come up with, really) and out comes a stream of angry words mixed with a fair amount of profanity. It's not always directed at Gold of course, though some days it seems like it is, especially when Gold manages to burn the eggs and spill the last of the coffee into the campfire. Sometimes it's his sleeping bag, sometimes it's his hair, sometimes it's when it rains and water gets in Silver's boots; he rarely lacks for something to yell about. It's much harder to be nice by accident and impossible to fake it, and whenever Silver lets something slip and gets annoyed with himself over it, Gold can't help but smile, feeling as if he's been rewarded for some good deed he hasn't done yet.

Silver remembers the first time that Gold gets impressively and smashingly drunk and he remembers him leaning forward to brush his lips against Silver's as if he did it all the time. Silver also remembers the utter lack of hesitation he experiences as he winds his fist back and nails Gold right in the cheek, shoving himself away from the table. He remembers breathing hard and feeling that if he'd been a creature with fur, every single strand would be bristled. He remembers his heart roaring in his head and Gold's dazedly hurt expression and feeling the tinge of guilt, but at the same time, he remembers Red standing up and clapping him on the shoulder as if to steady him and inclining his head as if to say that his reaction isn't completely unwarranted. Silver stays in Blue's room that night and he can barely look at Gold the next morning as he stammers out apologies.

When he thinks about it, Gold can still remember the sharp pain in his cheek as Silver reels his hand back and slams him in the face. In retrospect, he's horribly embarrassed over it and doesn't blame the other boy in the slightest. He doesn't regret his feelings and in another situation, he might be angry that Silver takes the violent route but still, he knows the other boy and knows that if he could choose a worse way to express his feelings, he'd be hard pressed to find one. Not only does he just kiss him instead of talking things over with him, but he essentially accosts him while drunk (and underage to boot!) in front of quite a few of their friends and people they admire. Gold might have hit himself too. When he wakes up the next morning, Gold doesn't want to talk to or see anyone but he can't possibly be that lucky. Red meets him outside his room and tells him that Silver hiding from him, training his pokémon on the other side of the center and that if he doesn't go apologize immediately, bad things will happen.

Silver accepts the apologies the best he can but isn't quite sure of how to react to anything else. They don't talk about whether the kiss had been for real or whether it was done in a purely drunken haze. He doesn't know if he wants to know the answer to that question, or which answer would make him feel worse. Frankly, he was banking on the latter, but in the end he doesn't ask and Gold doesn't offer and eventually, things go back to normal the best they can, even if something in Silver squirms strangely and sets him on edge whenever Gold gets particularly close.

Gold doesn't know what to do with himself. He can't bring himself to grow a pair and talk things over with Silver like a normal human being and take his rejection lumps like he absolutely expects to, so instead lets things fall back into some strange caricature of their routine. What he'd done hung between them like a glass wall and it's so obvious. If he's quick, Gold can catch the flash of uncertainty and anxiety dart through Silver's eyes before he hides it away, and Gold does his best to hide his own sadness at the whole thing. He doesn't want things to be like this forever, but he doesn't know if it's worth it to destroy what he…what THEY had worked so hard to create with each other. He doesn't know when it happened, but the thought of not being able to be with or talk to Silver at all -even his gruff, socially awkward conversation- destroys him, and he doesn't think that he can take the risk.

Silver is slowly going crazy.

Gold remains where he is.

_Enough._ The word drops from Silver's lips like a bomb, low and soft and completely unlike what he sounds like when he's angry, and he walks around the campsite to deftly pluck the hammer that Gold's using to secure down his tent out of his hands. The tent falls and Silver ignores the other boy's protests, repeating himself. He doesn't need to say anything more and he knows it, watching the façade of anger and perpetual happy-go-lucky slip off of Gold's face like wet paint. Silver tries to keep his face neutral but he doesn't think that it works.

_Please don't leave_, is the only thing that Gold can get to come out of his mouth. This isn't what Silver expects to hear and Gold knows it but can't think about that because it's more than nothing, and he knows that if he keeps talking, Silver probably won't walk away from him mid-word. He doesn't and instead sits down on top of Gold's collapsed tent, probably on purpose because Silver's a jerk like that. Gold steadies himself and opens his mouth again to keep talking.

It's at least six months before he gets kissed again. It's easy to keep track when it's not exactly a common happening, Silver knows. He could say that he's dating Gold but he's not sure if that would be a lie because they don't really go on dates, instead spending more time training against each other and spending a longer time around the campfire, talking. Well, Gold talks more than Silver talks, but Silver talks better with his eyes and his face and as long as Gold can see him, he figures that that's okay. It's a simple thing but he knows it's coming; he can feel Gold leaning on his shoulder and there's no booze on his breath this time, and when Gold gently brushes his lips on Silver's, Silver fights the urge to run but doesn't. It's not a bad feeling but it's a new one and Silver can't deny that his first reaction to the unknown is to run for the hills. Still, he doesn't, and lets the touch come: hesitant and unsure and absolutely welcomed.

Gold sort of can't believe that Silver hasn't run for it yet and revels in the permission he's given, ignoring briefly the sharp stare leveled on him to cover up the other boy's nerves and leans in again for another kiss, and another. He presses his luck and finds his arm wrapped around Silver's waist and his hand pressed to the small of his back, unaware and uncaring as to whether he was pulling Silver close or pulling himself closer. He leans away only when Silver jolts, feeling his sneasle tug suddenly on his pant leg. It seems weird to kiss in front of the pokémon and Gold laughs nervously, more than a little hesitant to see Silver's reaction to the whole thing. Those bright, expressive eyes are soft, and Gold smiles.

Silver smiles back, just a tiny bit, no more than the very edges of his lips tilting up.

Gold begins laughing hysterically.

Gold likes to kiss Silver in the daylight so that he can see his face and watch his every reaction from the still slightly embarrassed scowl that doesn't really mean anything most of the time to the red that colors his ears. He knows that Silver hates that about him but he doesn't mind because he hates how Silver always likes to hide.

Silver prefers to kiss Gold at night so that he can't be seen. If he can't see, then no one can see his hands hooking in Gold's belt loops to pull him closer even though they can both feel it and know that it's happening, and no one can see him occasionally forgo a kiss on the lips for one on the forehead instead, something that would embarrass him to no end otherwise.

The next time they have a get-together with the others, they come together and Gold is holding Silver's hand, steadfastly (not to mention cheerfully) ignoring the redhead's every grouchy attempt to wrench it away from him. They both know that he could take it back if he really wanted and that Gold would release him if he was serious, but he wasn't so he wouldn't and that was just how it worked and neither of them would have it any other way. Silver glares the whole time and Gold talks the whole time and Blue sends Gold death threats with her eyes that he ignores until Silver jabs him in the side with his elbow, which, in the end, is actually pretty normal.

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><p>Read and Review to let me know what you think, please!<p> 


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